If you're not ready to accept an apology, even if they mean it, but you want to be able to accept it and move forward at some point, it's perfectly acceptable to tell them you need some time. Just leave and never return.

When a friend apologizes for a transgression—whether right away or eons after the dust has settled—you may still need more time to forgive and forget, especially if said friend has done something, ahem, unforgivable.

Never ruin an apology with an excuse.- Does Love Really Mean Never Having to Say You’re Sorry? Here's how to accept a friend's apology—the right way—so you can release those negative feelings you're holding onto. It can repair just about anything. Sticking to general, vague apologies might mean that they don't actually understand what they did wrong or aren't offering a sincere apology. In a perfect world, when a friend tells you they're truly sorry for something they've done to hurt you, step one is to appropriately acknowledge the mea culpa; step two is to formally accept it; and step three would be for you to let the whole thing go. When you hurt someone or someone hurts you, you probably often think that you know how things will go: you (or they) will apologize, you'll talk things out, one or the other of you (or both) will accept the apology, and you'll move forward. It's natural to want to exact revenge on someone who has done you dirty—but doing so only perpetuates, and perhaps magnifies, the issue at hand. A woman on a mission needs no permission. And hopefully, it will have rubbed off by the time it's your turn next to say sorry. Life becomes easier when you learn to accept an apology you never got. Psychology Today © 2020 Sussex Publishers, LLC, Eating Disorder Treatment May Be Failing Black Women, Dogs Really Do Smell You More Than They See or Hear You, How Gratitude Journaling Can Reduce Workplace Mistreatment, Why Every Racist Mentions Their Black Friend, Why Forgiving Does Not Require an Apology. 2 COMMENTS. You don't owe it to them to accept the apology they give you. Presumably practice makes perfect, and people seldom practice apologizing, and they do it very badly, if at all.
Likewise, don't insist that your friend's apology wasn't good enough (when deep down you know it was), don't make her apologize over and over, and try not to hold it against her. "As we know, an apology is an expression of regret for something we’ve done wrong, so if someone is apologizing but they’re not truly owning up to what it is that they did wrong or they’re not willing to change their behavior so they don’t do that same thing again, then sometimes it puts us in a position where it’s a challenge or we don’t want to accept their apology," Dumaz says. Why Forgive a Mass Killer Who Murdered Your Son?

Is There a Biological Basis for Charismatic Leadership? Forgiveness to me doesn't mean accepting someones apology. If you receive a proper apology, like 'I'm sorry for doing XYZ,' and not a so-called "non-apology" (aka the classic, 'I'm sorry you feel that way'), then take the first step toward forgiveness via acceptance. If you're not going to maintain a relationship with your friend, parent, sibling, coworker, roommate, or partner, you might not feel a need to accept an apology from them. It just means you value your relationship more than your ego.”, “Apology suggests that you are keeping me from doing what I need to do, which implies I am somehow powerless to do otherwise.”, “But when someone does wrong, when we make mistakes, we don’t say we’re sorry. When you say sorry, make sure you mean it.

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